CALLING ALL CRITICS

Below is the second piece I am posting of a story in my head.  I got so much great feedback on the small piece I posted under “Out of Curiosity” that I wanted to post another one.  Keep in mind it is a fresh rough draft I put to pen this morning and I know it needs work but would love your thoughts.

Trying to calm the fear rising up in me I slapped her hoping to get a response.  Her eyes were fixed on something ahead of our car. “Slow down!” I screamed to Jessie while focusing my attention on Kimber.  “Can you see them?” she whispered.  “See what? You’re fucking scaring me!” I yell while looking from her to the road in front of us.  Jessie slams his foot on the break sending me cursing into the back floorboard.  He jumped out of the car before I could even comprehend what was going on. 

At this point I am not sure if we made the right decision to leave the monastery, everything seems to be moving too fast.  I am feeling sorely inadequate to handle what might be hiding in our path. I uncurled myself from the floorboards, sat back in the seat, and noticed Jessie walking forward with his hands reaching out as if to touch something hanging in the air.  Kimber was still sitting there asking us if we could see.  I couldn’t see anything, “What are we supposed to be seeing?”  She got a grimace on her face and then there it was, all around us, super tall, beautifully strong men, in armor with wings lining the road in front of us.   

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3 thoughts on “CALLING ALL CRITICS

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