MISAPPROPRIATED IMAGINATION

I worry despite my best efforts NOT to worry. When I am very tired my mind will create trauma’s where none have occurred.  This is a true story UNTIL I realized I had fallen asleep… and then I woke up in a panic and my mind raced through several fictions before I was able to confirm reality.  This story is a fictional fear.  We can not predict or change the future with our worry.

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“Please don’t go to work today. The streets are bad and your car sucks on ice.”I had already asked my husband to go in late when we went to bed the night before but here he was waking me up to say goodbye.

“I have to go I don’t have a choice.”

“Yes you do, you always have a choice and braving the icy roads isn’t worth your life.”

“I’ll be fine.”

“Then take my car it does better and I will call my boss to come get me.”

“Promise?”

“Yes, but leave your keys in case he can’t.”

“No… I’ll just take my car”

“Please drive safe and text me when you get to work or I will worry.”

“Ok. I love you have a good day.”

I stayed awake watching my phone for the next 30 minutes waiting for his text but I must have fallen asleep because it was an hour and a half later when I looked at my phone next.

No text.

He should have been at work over an hour ago even with these nasty roads.

I text him, -ARE YOU THERE?

I wait.

I text.

I wait.

I call.

I get up and start getting ready for work thinking he will call me and everything will be fine.

I get out of the shower and still no response.

I wait.

I text.

I call.

My phone rings and his name flashes on the screen.

I answer, “I hate it when you make me worry.”

“Ma’am” it isn’t my husband’s voice on the phone.

“ yes “ I whisper

“It seems that Mr. Hasty was in the middle of texting you when we found him.”

“Found him where?” I just knew he was texting and driving and they found him in a ditch somewhere.

“He was at his desk ma’am”

“I don’t understand”

“He was texting you –I’M SAFE but he had a heart attack before he could hit send.”

 

Do not anticipate trouble, or worry about what may never happen. Keep in the sunlight. ~ Benjamin Franklin

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29 thoughts on “MISAPPROPRIATED IMAGINATION

  1. Husby once killed me off in one of his dreams – I was already dead, presumed murdered, but he thought I might be out there still, so he got MARRIED AGAIN so that he could use his new wife’s money to come and look for me. Bizarre.

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  2. Yikes! What an ending!

    When my boys hit driver’s license age, I sent them texts asking them if they were alright whenever I heard an ambulance. They knew to text me back right away or risk me hunting them down.

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    • I used to be much worse. I can’t imagine how I will be once my daughter is old enough to drive. One of my good friend has a daughter who was hit head on this weekend by a drunk driver…she is ok BUT omg the horror.

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  3. That’s me all over, too. I immediately fear the worst half the time. Thankfully it doesn’t happen often nowadays, but it’s Hell when it does. Lol. 🙂

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  4. My daughter worries like this! She text a lot mom please tell me everything will be ok! Mom don’t forget your keys, purse, don’t forget this or that!
    I think she gets it from me! When she was 2 she was diagnosed with juvenile diabetes, thyroid disease and a blood clot mutation so her life has been about doctors and hospitals! I think I over obsessed and passed it on!
    I like the quote at the end!
    My Pa used to always say don’t borrow trouble from tomorrow! I tend to borrow so much It will take a lifetime to pay it back! 😄

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    • When it comes to my daughter it is hard not to worry but I can’t let her see it or hear it or she will OBSESS over it for days. A little boy in her Kung Fu class had her appendix out and she is certain every time she has a gas bubble it’s her appendix 😦

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      • Awh poor thing! They worry so much without us having to even say anything! Today mine is worried about her wisdom teeth oh and she thinks she has a spider bite. It truly never ends with her worrying. I like what you said….if I even sigh she’ll say mummy what’s wrong. OH boy! Oh she said the coolest thing last week she said Mummy I can always tell when something is wrong because I know your heart from the inside! How cool is that? So I think they can feel it!! I kind of like having someone one this earth that feels me! Have a super day. I just love the art on your profile pic. Very striking! You are so beautiful! 🙂

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          • You have skills! You are amazingly talented! I feel like we have this reservoir of creativity that we have barely touched! Imagine where you’ll be in 10 years! Ok maybe dont do that!
            Tonight My girl said OMG mummy Christmas is just a few weeks away what do you want for Christmas I need to know by Friday! She said my brain is obsessing again mummy! Im going to bed early! Kids are so funny! 😄

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            • Well thank you, I feel like my creativity is dwindling the older I get 😦
              My daughter always says I wish I wasn’t a hypochondriac. And I reply..don’t be and I tickle her and we laugh. But I know it causes her so much anxiety. Right now she is scared of the HantaVirus because someone mentioned it at school. 😦

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              • I know what you mean about creativity! I will share that I try to stay in an environment of positive flow which is hard given life and kids but….one thing I like to do is watch Photoshop lessons online. Using your layers palette you can create some awesome designs. That is what I do. Also there are some on Youtube. My boss told me that OY this was like a punch in the gut but he said Michelle I need you to beef up your design skills. WOW! ok um so the 25+ years experience I have was not good enough so I literally had to get out of my box. It was so hard for me and I struggle design wise. I work with eddy award winning artist and I admit my skills are not where they are. I think it is hard when you are held to someone else’s standard of what good art really is. I suffer a lot in this area so I am surprised that you feel this way. Not happy of course. You are welcome to check out my art under art by MichelleMarie and use any of those ideas. I have found that if I browse other artists work then it plants a seed that grows. I loved that art piece you did with the heart. I also love that you incorporate your photos in your art. They are beautiful!
                My girl is afraid of Ebola. Literally I get texts about it. So much so I made some funny posts about it because she’s such a nut! She just got a job working for an internal medicine dr so everyday when she picks me up she tells me about a new disease. She self-diagnoses on WebMd. So thank god your girl doesn’t learn how to use that! OH my. Last week Alex was convinced she had Lupus or shingles. It was dry skin but it is always something. It’s nice to know someone else has a child that worries about sickness like mine! OY! It’s 10am and no text of peril. Thank God. 🙂

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  5. I got good at letting go. Don’t believe in fate neither but just letting go of what I have no control to begin with. My daugyetr goes out almost every night and doesn’t come home until late night (early morning). I guess she is a chip of the old block 🙂 Anyways, I go to sleep and never think of anything happening to her, I just go to sleep and when I wake up in the morning I peek outside to make sure her car is there. Horrible dream I would say, horrible.

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